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Behind the veil

Behind the veil there is an attractive young lady with shining mousy hair, twinkling eyes, roly-poly face, beaky nose, tiny ears with hanging ear rings, spunky lips and swan-like neck. This is an average Indian concept about a bride.

 Huh...Marriage...
Indian society is more concerned with "marriage". The moment a baby girl is born, her parents and the entire society they are belonging to will start thinking about her marriage. Once she completed her basic studies, she will be pushed into a "pressure cooker" of deliberately misconstrued social values and rules. The whole world seems to be forcing her deeply to get tied up with a guy.

Years back women were just a standing statue behind the door. The society prevented women from making their own living and there was an ineludible dependence on men's income. But now the situation has changed a lot. Women are actively participating in every field such as social work, science and technology etc. The august entry of women into the field of politics is an admirable step in this era. Still the society is pulling her back into a narrow path. If a woman were to decide to remain single beyond the time boundary set by the society, she would be ridiculed and pitied by the community. From my point of view, getting married without thinking about "what is life all about?" will go tits-up as a social being. It's quite easy to be an "amul baby" without concerning about the society or without doing anything to the society.



Marriage should be for the right reasons. Indians, especially Keralites get married for foolish reasons. The most common reason put forward by the Keralites is the "security". Is security possible by a marriage in a state with high sexual assault rate ? I don't think so. May be, after marriage, woman will start facing domestic violence. The traditional social norms will accept such a domestic violence within the four walls of the home as a part of her life. 

Even the current educational system has not changed the mindset. They are only teaching her to be good wives and mother. I know, being a mother is a divine emotion and it's a feeling of being complete. But, can you imagine what the feelings of "Blessed Teresa of Calcutta" are? Now, I remember her famous quote, "a life not lived for others is not a life". 


She lived a life of love and kindness. She showed a great commitment in uplifting the society. Capturing the love and devotion of so many from all walks of life is such a gargantuan feeling.

I have many friends(girls) who are working after their studies in top MNCs without bothering about what is happening around them and concerned only about "money and marriage". Persuading a professional degree and working in an MNC with plenty of money above the neck is not the ultimate purpose of our life. Money money money.... People are all behind the money. But no one tries to be the soul of society. The most crestfallen matter I found is that a lot of my friends (boys) don't prefer their wives to work after marriage.   

As a human, we should do something for the society. Getting married in the budding stage of life and shrinked to our own personal life is not a good choice. 

Things were pretty normal till the end of my college life. Soon, I started facing the question, "ha...when is your marriage?". Parents..relatives..neighbors... all began to think about my marriage. My relatives and parents told me that the age of 22 is the best to get married and within the age of 25 a lady should conceive. Is there a perfect age to get married? One of my friend supported my attitude towards the society and  tried to understand what I want to do in my life. I was greatly inspired by his wordings, "am pretty sure that you will reach somewhere at the heights". Yet, I am pushed into the prison of nasty beliefs. I am not expecting my parents to let me free without having married to someone. But I have a strong persuasion to serve the society by exposing my potential. 

We all have an obligation to the society. Obligation is something which should come from our inner spirit. We should be fully satisfied with our contributions to the burning society. Life will be meaningful only when we make contributions to both the society and ourselves. Getting married is a contribution to ourselves, our personal life. We are getting complete as a daughter, sister, wife and mother by our wedding. 

Beyond these, we are "humans" and the world is in our hands.


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